I VISITED MY PREGNANT SISTER, AND UPON WITNESSING HER HUSBAND’S BEHAVIOR TOWARDS HER, I DECIDED TO EDUCATE HIM — HE RETURNED BEGGING FOR FORGIVENESS WITHIN A DAY. What are you supposed to do when you visit your sibling, nearing her delivery date at nine months gestation, and observe her being handled as domestic staff? This situation unfolded during a business trip, necessitating a short stay at my sister’s residence. On the initial night itself, I observed her spouse express dissatisfaction with the meal’s temperature and carry his plate upstairs to engage in gaming while dining. Concurrently, my weary sister was engaged in cleaning, washing clothes, managing birth preparations, and independently painting the baby’s room. I attempted a private conversation with her husband, proposing he might, at minimum, wash some dishes or assemble furniture for the baby’s room. “You are being overly dramatic… Lily finds pleasure in attending to my needs, just as she will find pleasure in caring for our child. Refrain from introducing your modern ideas into my home. My spouse is merely fulfilling her expected duties.” My anger surged, yet instead of creating a confrontation, I devised a strategy! The following morning I ⬇️The following morning I woke up before everyone else. I quietly made my way to the kitchen and started preparing breakfast – a proper, nutritious meal, not just toast and cereal. When Lily came downstairs, looking ashen and tired despite it being barely 7 am, I had a warm plate ready for her, placing it in front of her with a gentle smile. “Eat up, sis. You need to keep your strength up.”
Then, as her husband, Mark, strolled in, yawning and expecting to be served, I placed a plate in front of him too, but pointedly served Lily first, making sure she had the best portion and the most nutritious items. Throughout breakfast, I engaged Lily in conversation, asking about her sleep, her aches, and the baby’s movements. I made sure to voice my admiration for all she was doing, painting the baby’s room while nine months pregnant, and managing everything else. I even offered, loudly enough for Mark to hear, “Lily, after breakfast, let’s tackle assembling that crib together. Two pairs of hands are always better than one, and you shouldn’t be lifting heavy things on your own.”
Mark remained silent throughout breakfast, picking at his food and occasionally glancing at me with a furrowed brow. After breakfast, as Lily started to clear the table, I gently but firmly took the plates from her hands. “Nope, you sit. Let me handle this. You need to rest before we start on the crib.” I efficiently cleared the table and started washing the dishes, humming softly to myself. I could feel Mark’s eyes on me, but I deliberately ignored him, focusing all my attention on Lily and making sure she was comfortable and taken care of.
Later, as I started unpacking tools to assemble the crib in the baby’s room, I noticed Mark lingering in the doorway. I looked up, meeting his gaze directly. “Mark, could you give me a hand here? It’s a bit awkward to manage these pieces on my own. And Lily really shouldn’t be bending and lifting so much.”
He hesitated for a moment, then grudgingly stepped into the room. As we worked together, I maintained a calm and friendly demeanor, but I made sure to subtly highlight Lily’s efforts and needs. “Lily chose such a lovely color for the walls, didn’t she? It must have been tiring painting all this at this stage.” Or, “This crib looks quite sturdy. It’s good Lily is thinking ahead and getting everything ready.”
Finally, as we tightened the last screw on the crib, I turned to him, my voice gentle but firm. “Mark, pregnancy is a challenging time for a woman. Lily is carrying your child, and she needs your support and care now more than ever. She’s not domestic staff; she’s your partner, the mother of your child. Treating her like this, especially when she is so close to delivery, is simply not right. It’s not about ‘modern ideas’; it’s about basic human decency and respect for the woman who is about to bring your child into the world.”
I left him standing there, the assembled crib between us, and went to check on Lily. Later that evening, as I was packing my bag, preparing to leave early the next morning as planned, there was a knock on my door. It was Mark. He looked genuinely contrite, his eyes filled with a mixture of shame and realization.
“I… I wanted to apologize,” he stammered, his voice low. “You were right. I’ve been… blind. Lily is amazing, and she shouldn’t be doing everything on her own, especially now. I’ve been selfish and… and stupid.” He took a deep breath. “I’ve already apologized to Lily. I told her I’d do better. I will do better. Thank you… for opening my eyes.” He looked genuinely humbled, almost begging for forgiveness, not just from me, but from the situation itself.
I nodded slowly, a small measure of relief washing over me. “Good, Mark. It’s not about thanking me. It’s about treating Lily with the love and respect she deserves. She needs you to be a partner, especially now. Be there for her, truly be there for her. That’s all that matters.”
The next morning, as I left, I saw Mark in the kitchen, not being served, but actively making breakfast, carefully preparing a plate for Lily who was sitting at the table, a faint smile gracing her lips. It wasn’t a perfect ending, and there would likely be more work to do, but it was a start. A definite, much-needed start.